If this sounds like you, what you might be seeking is - Emotional Stability.
Emotional stability refers to a person’s state of being stable and balanced. A person who has the capability to cope with general changes in the environment without responding with an intense emotional reaction.
Keep in mind that emotional stability does not mean suppressing or ignoring your emotions.
Often, when people are faced with uncomfortable emotions and feelings, such as fear and shame, their first reaction is to reject that feeling.
They may indulge in counterproductive coping mechanisms such as using substances to make themselves feel better and push the negative emotions away!
However, pushing away or storing these emotions can bring them back at various points in time with double the intensity causing an emotional outburst.
Ignoring your emotional state can prove to be harmful and counterproductive to your mental health and cause you a lifetime of hurdles!
Q - What are a few characteristics of a person who is considered to be Emotionally Stable?
They can deal with stressful situations with calmness and ease
They are not discouraged by setbacks and disappointments
They are adapt to change easily
They are able to recognise and express their needs
They focus on getting around a hurdle, should one occur
They can learn from mistakes and criticism
They are able to recover quickly from emotional wounds such as failure or rejection
I'm sure your next question is, sowhat do I have to do in order to reach this stage of zen?
Well here is where the concept of Emotional Hygiene kicks in. Why only restrict your hygiene practice to washing your hands 5 times a day? Your emotions need some care too.
Emotional hygiene is a practice of allowing yourself to feel your emotions right to the brim especially when faced with a few challenges!
Practicing good emotional hygiene will not only help you be more present in the moment, but will also allow you to deal with your emotions in the moment to avoid them interfering with the quality of your life in the long run.
PRO TIP : Emotions don't need a label - they are neither good nor bad. They are simply reactions to your situations and are meant the be accepted in the moment!
Here are a few tips that may help you achieve Emotional Stability :
ACCEPT YOUR EMOTIONS
The key tip to achieving emotional stability is learning to accept your emotions and your emotional experiences.
Let’s not restrict ourselves to not to think or to make an attempt to push these emotions away.
Instead give yourself and your emotions enough time to feel those emotions completely.
Analysing your emotions helps you understand what the best way forward for you would be!
The key is treating about our emotions with respect
2. CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE
Sometimes all we need is a different sense of vision because we only see what we want to see.
Changing your perspective can make you look at the things differently and can help you assess negative life situations better .
For example : We can shift our focus on the things we are grateful for in the long run, instead of focusing on the parts of life that did not go according to plan. One way to do this would be by starting a gratitude journal!
3. MAKE A PLAN THAT GETS YOU MOVING
Creating a micro plan or a checklist of the things that can get you moving is a great place to begin - especially if you are able to prioritise important tasks first.
For example : While going through a break up if you find it difficult to get out of the bed - Start by indulging in simple activities such as taking a shower first.
After that you can plan to tackle bigger tasks such as going for a walk or meeting your friends.
4. KEEP YOUR EXPECTATIONS IN CHECK
Don’t expect your life to be a smooth ride. Life can be enjoyable but it can never be smooth.
Uncomfortable bumps and downs are part and parcel of life.
The more open you are towards unsettling life events , the less emotionally reactive you will be if they happen.
5. RECOGNISE YOUR STRESSORS
Emotionally stable people understand their stressors.
As a result they are more prepared for the stressful situations.
Moreover they know how to avoid the situations that induce stress unnecessarily. So take a note of things that stress you out and take your first step in being aware of your triggers!
6. FIND ACTIVITIES THAT CALM YOU
To be emotionally stable and to beat the stress, we need to get to the activities that help us to relieve ourselves.
Social interactions, Yoga, gardening, writing are a few examples that can help you to shift focus and relax your mind in a stressful situation.
7. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO MAKE YOU HAPPY
Create a safe space for yourself and surround yourself with people who uplift you. Understand which people make you happy and keep you in a positive headspace and make sure to spend time around them.
Having a set of people that you trust is definitely an added bonus to gain some perspective in difficult times.